David Botti
|
Dec 18, 2007 11:59
I recently spoke by phone with a military friend who's currently a nursing student at the Walter Reed Army Medical Center.
He talked about how being with the war's wounded every day affects him,
both on a human level and as someone who may be deployed to Iraq in the
future. Of the scandal which broke last February at the hospital, he assumes the media blew it out of proportion and hasn't seen any negative conditions at the facility.
What's
interesting about his words is how in some cases they could be applied
to any civilian hospital worker in the country, and in others we see
how his position as a soldier informs his experiences. As he is still
on active duty in the Army, he's asked for anonymity. Excerpts:
On working as a stateside medic and nursing student:
Personally
I’d say that you get to see another side of the war from being on the
health care side. [The wounded soldiers] are treated with a lot of
respect. They’re really cared for. On an emotional level sometimes the
reality of it catches you. You try to be professional, but you’re still
human. And sometimes it dawns on you the situation that person’s in is
a very harsh one…There are situations that I’m very happy these people
are alive and everything else, but sometimes you wonder if there are
fates worse than death.
On his thoughts during off-duty time:
I
think off-duty I think about it more. I think about the possibility–you
know, I wear the same uniform as they do. These guys are younger than
us. They’re kids. It scares me because I know that I’m still gonna be
in the Army until 2010, and I’m pretty sure I’m going back over [to
Iraq]. And to be faced with that reality every day looking at the
people you’re looking at, and knowing that this is a very
indiscriminate war; knowing that you can be walking to the bathroom and
just get hit by something in any kind of zone. It's guerrilla warfare.
It’s ugly. Your chances are very good that you can be that guy. There’s
a lot more people injured than are coming up dead.
On conversations with patients:
They’re
pretty honest about what happened, or what they remember–which they
usually don’t. They’re usually like, “yeah, I was driving or doing this
and then I woke up and I was in Germany.” They like to talk it out.
They love to try to relate to you [as an Army soldier].
On how he comforts a patient's fears:
I
think it’d be safe to say it’s kind of like, you know how us
infantryman have that black humor. I think humor is one of the things I
use.
On controlling his own fears:
I think
the biggest thing that affects me is my fears. I mean, honestly, I get
nightmares and stuff. But I think that’s more my anxiety of what my
future holds. Sometimes you just need to indulge in the work and do
whatever it is to help that person. Sometimes you focus on that person,
and that’s how you get by.
On the worst he’s seen in a stateside military hospital:
The
burn ward–it was just gruesome, you know. Everything was rearranged and
changed. They have pictures [of the soldiers beforehand]–you know, a
family puts up pictures. It’s a common practice. You look at someone
who’s burnt severely and it’s hard to ever imagine they’re a human. And
then right next to that patient–that slab of meat, rearranged face,
it’s almost monstrous–right next to that, only to make it more
melancholy, is the picture of the young kid with his future ahead of
him. Not to sound so cliché. But, you know that person has the future
ahead of him. That look that says, ‘look at me I just joined the Army,
I’ve got my new uniform, a young girlfriend.’ And they’re not kind of
robbed, they’re a hundred percent robbed of that. I think that’s a dark
reality right there.
On the best he’s seen:
The
best moment I’ve had was one of my first patients I had. I actually
watched him for three weeks. I took care of him. He was one of my
harder cases, and I purposely took him for academic reasons. And I
watched him go from being very immobile and sick–just looking like hell
to now he’s talking. That was powerful. You actually watch your
accomplishment by giving care, you actually nourish something back to
life.
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